Sorry. Not sorry.

Well, this is a sorry state of affairs. I am in an all too familiar spot. It’s been ages since I published a post. Do I have excuses? Yes. Are they good ones? Some. Does anyone really care? Probably not.

I’m not just being self-deprecating here. I don’t have many followers. A handful of people read my stuff, and some of them are kind enough to hit like or leave a comment. If I were to go away for good, something might someday jog your memory and bring to mind one of my posts, but would you miss me? Hardly.

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There are bloggers I’ve followed who seem to have packed up and left WordPress. Or maybe they’re out there in some new iteration that I haven’t discovered yet. If they resurface*, I’m glad to see them back, but they don’t owe me an apology. I’m not gazing at my screen, arms crossed saying “Well, well, well. Look who’s come crawling back. Just what do you have to say for yourself? This better be good!”

Most of us here on WordPress are doing it for the fun of it; for the practice of it; for the catharsis of it; for the whatever-the-hell our reason is for it. We’re not getting paid, and we’re beholden to no one.

And still, many of us feel the need to explain why we haven’t posted in a while.

Your day job has hit a rough patch (my 14 tax seasons at a CPA’s office qualify). Your three kids are in three different schools with activities out the wazoo. You’re in the middle of senior finals. You’re busy attending all the Kardashian baby showers. More than one blogger I follow is busy publishing a book. (P.S. I hate you. P.P.S. No, I don’t! I envy you! Please be my friend so some of that inspiration and creativity will rub off!) Heck, even if the biggest item on your calendar is rearranging your sock drawer and you can’t find it in yourself to post, guess what? It’s really ok.

sorry

 

I myself have been a serial apologizer most of my life. I have been known to say “sorry” to people who hit me with their grocery carts, or to start out confrontations saying “I’m sorry, but you really hurt my feelings.” So, if you feel the need to apologize, go ahead. I can relate. I will listen, sympathize, and give you absolution if that’s what you want

But, of all the things we have to be sorry about, not posting on our own, unpaid, just-for-the-hell-of-it blogs should not be one of them. I’m not doing it anymore, and neither should you!

Here are some people who really should be apologizing:

  • Bullies and internet trolls.
  • Anyone who sexually harasses anyone else.
  • People who litter.
  • That client who’s been ghosting me for the last two months, after making me think I’d be getting regular writing assignments.
  • Whoever designs public restrooms without hooks for your coat and purse.
  • People who take up two parking spots.
  • The makers of the GMC commercial with the weird looking little kid and the annoying “Me and You” song.
  • Companies that make you go through four different screens just to unsubscribe from their stupid emails.
  • Whoever keeps shrinking “fun size” candy bars.
  • The guy having a loud phone conversation in this coffee shop. Scratch that – he just got up to buy 4 servicemen from the nearby air force base their coffee. Dammit, now I’m sorry for not offering to do that myself.

We’re all human. There will always be something to feel sorry for. Save your apologies for the big stuff.

Now go and write something. Or don’t. Either way, you’re forgiven.

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Yes. Yes, you will. And that’s perfectly fine.

 

*Note: I started writing this post yesterday and set it aside to edit today. Overnight, I saw that one of the first blogger/poets I followed posted after an absence of nearly years! First of all, I’m wondering “what are the odds?!”

Second, did he apologize? Hell no! A post published a few days earlier (and that I somehow missed) was a story of someone entering a bar after a long absence. Brilliant!

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13 thoughts on “Sorry. Not sorry.

  1. You bring up good points. I’ve been blogging for almost eight years. For me, it’s a combination of my electronic diary (sounds weird for a 57-year-old guy to have a diary) and a look out of my window, sharing things I enjoy. For the first years, there were very few people who even saw it. Now, there are people on several continents that I know a lot about because of blogging and it’s not like I sit in my pajamas and do this. My wife and I have a fairly active social life and I am involved with many things locally.

    Decades ago, we might have called these friends “pen pals.” For as long as it stays fun for me, I will continue on and never apologize for the frequency or quality of my posts. I have a couple of thousand followers now and that has a lot to do with re-blogging and making those friends over time.

    So, my advice, for what it is worth, is that as long as it is fun for you, do it. If it stops being fun, well then stop.

    I’m happy to be one of your “handful”

    https://mitigatingchaos.wordpress.com. (currently active)
    https://villageundertaker.wordpress.com. (original blog, with no new content after this past Summer)

    Like

  2. Nope, none of us here should have to apologize for any absence or any item they choose to post about. These sites are the possession of those who created them, and they are free to decide The when and what of their site. So, no, you have nothing to apologize for. 😊

    Like

  3. Reading this has made me feel so much better. I have only been blogging a couple of months and still finding my way. I enjoy reading many other bloggers’ posts for enjoyment and to learn (your’s for example) but I have had moments of guilt because I’m not a frequent poster….yet.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Totally agree! When circumstances changed my approach to blogging, I felt guilty and worried, but my new schedule allows me more time to focus on the work in progress rather than always trying to think up something new to post. No one should have to apologize for that kind of thing!

    Liked by 1 person

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